This is my story so far: (it’s a bit long winded sorry- wouldn’t blame you if you switched off………..)
Hi – I am in debt, I admit it!
It took me a while to realise I couldn’t keep going any more. I was living with my partner at the time and I kept going home at lunchtime to get to the post first so I would hide any letters. My problem was that she worked shifts so I had to plan it very carefully. I knew what date some letters would arrive but others I could do nothing about. One day she confronted me with a large amount of mail and demanded to know what was going on? I basically broke down and told her everything. At first she was very angry, which was understandable and then after about a week calm had set in. I explained when the debt had started (I will come back to that) I did a search on the web and found a company that I entered into a DMP with.
This lasted about 12 months when I discovered this forum. I immediately went back to my debt company and asked about an IVA, they said that would be ok, so I completed all the paperwork and it was accepted. I was elated, just like we all are at being accepted!
That was 3 years ago. 12 months into the IVA, we started having problems and we ended up splitting up and I moved out into rented accommodation, my name was still on the joint mortgage so I spoke to my IP who insisted on a valuation of the property. Luckily for me it was in negative equity and my name was removed with the permission of the IP and £250 cost to a solicitor for the privilege. I now am single and to be honest I am very happy! Now I am not having a go at people in relationships, it’s just not for me!
I am now 2 ½ years into the IVA and have had to have a couple of payment breaks for vehicle repairs and then a 3 month break for the purchase of a replacement vehicle after it blew up! All is not well on the IVA front, so I have decided to apply for bankruptcy. I am just awaiting my certificate of failure. I have gone down this route because. I cannot maintain the level of payments for the remainder of the term. I have worked out (never mind the I+E sheet) that once all my direct debits had gone out of the bank, including the IVA payment, it left me with £235.00 a month to live on and that includes, food, fuel, clothing, car tax, prescriptions etc. so I firmly believe I am doing the right thing. I am not trying to shy away from my responsibilities; I am just trying to sort my life out the best way possible!
I will keep posting on how it is all going…………………………
Anyway, if you aren’t all asleep now, I will get back to how I got into debt in the first place…….
It started about 15 years ago when I moved in with another ex (who incidentally I am very good friends with now, despite splitting up with her about 10 years ago! – we have the occasional meal together and have a laugh, it purely plutonic and we enjoy each others company) she had a well paid job and was very sensible with money. I started to try and keep up with the spending and trying to match what was being spent, if that makes any sense? I was taking out credit cards and was living off my overdraft, which the bank increased every time I asked them too. She knew nothing of my debt at this point and other things were going wrong so we spit up and I moved in with a mate for 3 months. At the time house prices were very low so I bought my own house for £26k – I even got a mortgage!
I enjoyed living on my own but was still in debt so I re-mortgaged to try and clear some of the debt, which I did but it didn’t last that long because I then met my most recent ex and I sold my house and we bought one together. Problem with that was I had got myself into the same situation as before, well paid job, sensible with money etc – can you see a picture forming here? I got found out and the rest as they say is at the beginning of this blog…………………
I only blame my situation on three things:
1. I should have had the nuts to say “no, I am sorry I can’t afford that”
2. I should have realised that you can’t live on credit
3. Love really is blind!
Anyway, that’s me done for now. I hope you haven’t been bored rigid and for those that have, I apologise and promise that future blogs will be a lot shorter.